I Don’t Want The Crumbs

In my grandma’s house, on top of her piano, are old black and white pictures of her grandparents, great grandparents, cousins, etc… She has told me their names before and how I’m related to them but honestly, I couldn’t tell you if I was paid to (Sorry Nanny).
I do remember though, that whenever she talks about the people in the pictures, I can tell that they mean alot to her. Because she knew them personally, for herself, firsthand. The difference between my relationship with them, and my grandma’s reationship with them is that she knew them personally, while I just know second-hand acounts, stories, and basically just a brief overview of who they are. 


When I was first saved, I wouldn’t study the Bible for myself. My spiritual life was barely surviving on devotionals sent to my email each morning, seeing a verse against a pretty background on Instagram, and reading a cheesy, cliche, christian quote on Facebook. While those things can be good, they can’t sustain me a healthy relationship with God. 

I love to listening to John Piper’s Ask Pastor John videos on Youtube. They are short, thought provoking, and are filled with good Biblical principles that I can apply to my life. But I have noticed that instead of going and reading the Bible for myself to see what God has to show me, I will scrolll through Youtube and find a John Piper message that I feel like applies to me for that day. 

Going to church and listening to sermons is a good thing, but when you start to depend on the preacher to be your only line of communication between you and God, it isn’t so much a good thing anymore.

Whenever I tell people about Jesus, I want to speak of him like my grandma does with the pictures on her piano. I want to have a genuine care and relationship. A first hand account of my relationship with Him, not John Piper’s relationship with Him, or my pastor’s relationship with him, or even what a devotional says about my relationship with Him. I want a first hand account, personal relationship with Him. 

Psalm 119:103 “How sweet are your words to my taste, sweeter than honey to my mouth!”

Yes, reading daily devotions, listening to sermons, reading clever christian quotes can be a good thing. They can feed my spiritual life and sustain me. But in comparison for actually reading and studying the Bible for myself, those are just the crumbs. I don’t want to live off of the crumbs from the Bread of Life!

John 6:35 “Jesus said to them, “I am the bread of life; whoever comes to me shall not hunger, and whoever believes in me shall never thirst.”

So whenever I tell an unbeliever about Jesus Christ, I want them to hear it in my voice that I know Him. Not just second-hand stories, but personally know Him like my grandma knew the people in the pictures on her piano. Why settle for just the crumbs when I can open up the Bible and read what God has to say to me for the day:) 

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Best of Beauty 2016

So I love reading end of the year favorites! They are always something I look forward to, seeing the best of the best for the year. Here’s mine!Too Faced Natural Matte Palette

I actually did a review on this with swatches and comparisons! 

Click here to see more!

Wet n Wild blush in Rose Champagne 

I hardly ever wear blush. Maybe once a month. But I love this one because it is so natural looking, easy to apply, and cheap.

Covergirl Clean Matte BB Cream

Honestly, I don’t know what possessed me to buy this product. I love dewy, glowy foundations. But this matte bb cream really blew me away. It has the perfect coverage and looks beautiful on the face! Covergirl is a brand that I never buy from because their products are always too pink for me (I have yellow undertones) but this matched perfectly. I was seriously blown away by this!

Too Faced Sweet Tea Bronzer

I might have only bought this because of the name😜 But this is a great bronzer that also took me by surprise. I don’t normally like baked bronzers/blushes but this is really great quality! It works for when I want to do a light “contour” also. 

Nars Radiant Creamy Concealer

My life will never be the same after using this. I ran out of my first one and didn’t want to spend the money buying another one. So I bought 3 more drugstore concealers trying to find something that would compare… But I ended up going back to my Nars concealer. I don’t know what they put in this but I love it! Full coverage, light weight, natural looking, beautiful finish. 

NYX Dark Circle Concealer Corrector

I did a review on this also with alot better pictures and a before and after!

click here to see the review!

Colourpop Aquarius Lippie Stix and Lip Liner

Pictures don’t do this color justice. It is the PERFECT lip color for me. If I could only use one lip product for life it would be this. It is beautiful!!!!

Maybelline Brow Precise Pencil

I have tried the Hourglass brow pencil and the Sephora brow pencil but this beats them both! It just works. Plus it is only like 7$ at the drugstore which makes it even better. 

Colourpop Highlighter in Spoon

This. Highlighter. It’s beautiful!!!! I love it waayyy better than Lunch Money. This is a really sparkly champagne colored highlighter. 

Wet n Wild Setting Spray

So I used to use the Urban Decay All Nighter but it really just sucked the moisture out of my skin. I prefer this Wet n Wild one over the Ud because it keeps my makeup from being too oily but at the same time gives my face a little bit extra moisture!

So that’s it! I hope maybe you found some products you might want to try! I’m already excited to try some new things in 2017 so hopefully next year I will have different yearly favorites. Have a great day and thanks for reading!!

I’m an Inbetween

Last night me and Tj went to a fall party with my family and some friends. I had a lot of fun, and a lot of food;)

One thing I realized last night though, is that God brings us through different seasons of our life, to draw us closer to Him. 

The past two years have been an inbetween season for me. By that I mean a transitioning stage. I have gotten married, gone through two jobs, moved three times, and gone to at least 4 different churches. Along the way I have made awesome new friends, and lost some. I have outgrown alot of things spiritually. The past two years have been wonderful in the sense that I get to be with my best friend every day and that I now have an awesome church family who I love. But there has been times when I would just cry because a certain season of my life has ended. It has been difficult for me to accept the fact that God has a plan and that it is for my good (Jeremiah 29:11). 

I have been in situations when two years ago, I would have felt perfectly normal in. But now I feel a little bit out of place. When me and TJ first got married, our old friends didn’t want to hang out with us as much. One reason was because we didn’t like to watch and do some of the same things they did, but another reason was because we had gone from being girlfriend and boyfriend, to husband and wife. It was a little disheartening for us to find people to hang out with who were our age and married. But, me and Tj don’t have kids, so whenever we are around other couples we like and they have kids, i can kind of feel a little out of place. It’s like I am stuck between two stages of life and not quite sure what to do about it. 

The past two years, though they have been wonderful and I wouldn’t change them for anything, has been difficult to navigate through. But looking back, I see how I have grown so much spiritually and closer to God. 

I look back to the moments He allowed me to feel alone and broken-hearted, so I would finally stop and listen to Him beckoning me. 

In my moments of loneliness was when I now realize I was the most sought-after.

Whenever I feel like I finally can be myself around people, and I have great friendships going, and I get to hang out with my family alot, is usually when I start forgetting that my relationship with God matters most. 

“Not that I am speaking of being in need for I have learned in whatever situation I am to be content.” Phillipians 4:13 
Looking back, I am now thankful for all the lonely tears that I shed because those were the moments when I stopped and listened to God saying that HE, above all else, wants me. He loves me, and He seeks after me??!! He so wants to be close to me that He gets me alone to show me that He alone, can fulfill me. 

Psalm 73:28 “My flesh and my heart faileth: but God is the strength of my heart and my portion for ever.”
In this verse the word flesh is also interpretted as flesh relation, near kin (family), blood relation, your self.

In the same verse, the word heart can be interpretted as thinking, memory, determination, emotions.

The word fail can also be interpretted as spent up, wasted away, vanish, perish, be destroyed, to be at an end, to cease.

So another way of reading this would be,

My family (or friends) and my emotions may cease, but God is the strength of my heart and my possession for ever.

Right now, I’m still at that awkward inbetween stage of life. Maybe you are too. Maybe you just retired, or your kids moved out, perhaps you moved out. Maybe you moved away from all your family and friends, or you’re trying to find a new church home. Maybe you just got saved and you’re in that stage where you old friends and old way of life isn’t as appealing as it once was. Where ever you’re at, don’t forget to look and listen for God in your moments of loneliness. And don’t let your moments of loneliness affect your relationship with God. Make the most out of your inbetween stages of life.

I Don’t Want To Talk To God

There are times in my life where i just feel numb. I will try to pray, and give up. I will look at my Bible, and have no urge to read it. I don’t feel happy. I don’t feel sad. I just have no peace. 

The world tries to sell me peace through self-help books, early morning yoga classes, a warm cup of coffee in a cozy corner.

But none of those things (and I have tried them all) are true peace. Peace of mind, maybe for a moment. But once i finish that self-help book, roll up my yoga mat, and finish that warm cup of coffee (or three), the uneasiness settles back in.

During these times, I really just don’t care to spend time with God. I want to care though. I miss the closeness I have known with God. I miss the peace.

So, what do I do? 

Psalm 51:10-12 “Create in me a pure heart, O God, and renew a right spirit within me. Cast me not away from your presence, and take not your Holy Spirit from me. Restore to me the joy of your salvation, and uphold me with a wiling spirit.”

First of all, confess of any sin or idols you have in your life. Start out on the right foot with God by humbling yourself and just being like “Lord, I know I have all these sins, but I want to get close to you, please forgive me.”

And then ask God to renew a right spirit within you. Just like David did. Ask HIm to restore the joy of salvation to you! I love these verses because it reminds me that i am not the only one who lost joy in my walk with God. Just knowing that gives me peace. 

Ask HIm to give you a willing spirit. There are a lot (alotta lot) of times where I’m just like, “God, I just don’t feel like reading right now. I don’t even feel like praying. I don’t want to go to church today, so please give me to want-to. Help me want to do this, and enjoy it while I am. I will ask Him to restore to me the joy of my salvation. That i won’t forget how He saved me and the way I felt in that moment.

Emotions are a gift from  God. But if I let my emotions be my measure for when I do and don’t read or pray, then I will stray from God very quickly, and lose my peace. 

Isaiah 26:3 “You keep him in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on you, because he trust in you.”

MIND FOCUSED ON GOD+TRUSTING SPIRIT= P E A C E

When I think about it, I mostly use the word “trust” when I or someone I know is going through a difficult time.

When things are going great in my relationships, everything is going as planned on my calendar, and I have more than 20$ in my bank account, I never say “I just need to trust God.”

This verse is a promise of perfect peace in the times when I don’t have the want-to to do anything, when my spirit is going through a difficult time. 

Philippians 4:6-9 “Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding , will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things. What you have learned and received and heard and seen in me- practice these things, and the God of peace will be with you.”

If we think on these things, practice these things, request these things to God, the peace of God will be with you. 

Monday/Work Day Music Playlist


Everyone has those days where they dread either going to work or school. I do mainly on Mondays.. Music is really important to me and speaks to me just as much as reading does. I think it is important that we fill our minds with positive, God-glorifying music. These 10 songs help me to either look forward to the work day ahead of me, or encourage me after a bad day at work.
1 Learning To Be The Light – newworldson
This song reminds me that I am not perfect, and that I am still learning.

 

2 #Escrow – Flame
I work in retail so I normally have some customers who hate you for no reason at all. It can be really tempting to roll my eyes or say something sarcastic to those people. I like this song because it reminds me that I am storing up treasures in heaven and whenever I encounter a hateful customer, I normally start singing this in my head lol

3 Don’t Fear – Flame feat. V. Rose
Your workplace should also be your mission field! This song is about saying what God wants to you to say and witnessing to others. It can be scary but we shouldn’t fear!

4 Love With Your Life- Hollyn
Honestly, I have kind of been disappointed in Hollyn but this is just a peppy song that wakes me up and reminds me that my love shouldn’t just be shown through words but also actions.

5 These Days – Mandisa
This is like, the ultimate Monday song XD I listen to this just about every Monday and as I listen I pray and thank God for His blessings in the everyday things.

6 Sunshine – Blanca
Again, this is a peppy song that I love to sing along with and dance to:)

7 Better With You – Bizzle
Better With You is probably one of my favorite 10 songs. I absolutely love it! Every time I listen to it, it is like I am singing a love song to God.

8 Believers – Bizzle
Once again, this is one of my favorite top 10 songs! I literally listen to this every single day. It is basically my theme song haha

9 Lights Out – Trip Lee
I love Trip Lee. He is one of the very few Christian rappers left that haven’t sold out yet. And believe me when I say I pray for him to stay strong! This song is off of his Rise album. It is a good reminder that this world is blind and it is our job as Christians to be the light and not to be blind ourselves.

10 Through Your Eyes – Britt Nicole
This is a song that I like to listen to after work. Work can be really depressing sometimes, especially dealing with people who treat you like you are worth dirt. This song is just a good reminder to try and look through His eyes at ourselves and realize that even though some people don’t think we are worth anything, God loves you and cherishes you!

Mondays are hard. The beginning of a work week is always a bummer. I love music and since I have a 20 minute drive to work each day, I have picked out the songs I listen to whenever I dread work, or just need some encouragement after a hard day at work. I hope you enjoy my Monday Playlist and that you find some new songs you enjoy!!

I Was Robbed

Tonight when I got home from church I discovered that I had been robbed. 

Not physically like my house or bank account. But even more importantly, I had been robbed spiritually. 

I have robbed myself of the joy I should have in salvation. I get so caught up in what I’m not that I completely forget what I am as a Christian.  

I have heard it been said that comparison is the theif of joy. And man can I testify to that. 

Galations 1:10 “For am I now seeking the approval of man or of God? Or am I trying to please man? If I were still trying to please man, I would not be a servant of Christ.”

Whenever I get on Instagram or Facebook and Pinterest I see all the places my friends are going. I see how many likes and views other bloggers get on their post. I lust after things that I can’t afford. I want to be satisfied and happy just like these other people I see are. 

I get so enveloped in what others have that don’t see that I have made them idols. These things become idols to me because I put their significance in my life over God’s.

Maybe for you it isn’t money or likes. Maybe it is talents and gifts. 

I love to sing. And I have an okay voice, it sounds decent. Whenever I hear another person who has an incredible voice get up and sing I get jealous and even bitter towards them and myself. I compare my voice to theirs and place my self worth in what I can do. 

Philippians 2:3 “Do nothing from selfish ambition of conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves.”

And it all roots from pride. My pride looks at others and says “I need to be as good and even better than they are, I need to be the best”. Which leads to comparison. Which leads to depression because I can’t measure up to another person because I am not them and that is not who God made me to be. 

Pride and comparison also leads to self-hate. 

I am a quiet person in general. Especially in public. To a lot of people I seem boring, and too quiet. Being a people person is always something I have struggled with. 

Whenever I start to compare myself to people I know who are sociable and fun to talk to and are just naturally good at making conversation. I start to hate myself for not being like them. I want to build walls between myself and other people. If I don’t like myself how can others?  

Comparison has robbed me of what I have as a child of God. 

God placed me in the exact spot I am in now for a reason. For a purpose that He  wants me to fulfill! 

He made me with an okay voice probably because He knew if I had a heavenly one I would be full of myself. 

He gave me my very own personality that is composed of all the different parts of my life and has made me what I am today.

He has blessed me with a job to make money and a house to live in. He gave me a wonderful husband who daily demonstrates to me God’s love and grace. 

He sent His only son to die for me. He still comes down and wraps Himself around me despite my filthy hands and my disgusting sins. 

I haved robbed myself the past few years. I stole away my joy and my peace of mind. I replaced it with things that the world duplicates as joy. But it was short lived and unstable because it depended on me. To have joy I can’t depend on myself. I have to depend on the one who is independent. 

1 Timothy 6:6 “But godliness with contentment is great gain.”

Whenever you become uncontent with your life you don’t gain anything. You only steal away the joy you could have and the peace of mind you have as a child of God. Don’t rob yourself!!! Take it from an expert theif who has broken into my heart and robbed myself of joy and contentment by comparing myself to others. 

When God Remains Silent

When God Is Silent
Psalm 83:1 “O God, do not keep silence; do not hold your peace or be still, O God!”

Lately it seems every time I sit down to write a devotional, or I try to have time with God I ended up leaving discouraged. How can I help others and share to them what God has been working on me about, when God has been silent? Do you ever pray sometimes and feel like your prayers just bounce right back to you? It is really discouraging and depressing.

Whenever I reach out to God and my hands come back empty, I want to give up and forget about it. I want to find fulfillment in something else that is for certain going to bring me satisfaction. Whenever I leave empty handed I begin to doubt God. I begin to doubt His love for me. Like maybe I am not good enough right now for Him to speak to me or work on my heart. I start to get the mindset that I can somehow earn His attention.
Whenever God becomes silent He always seems to pick the worst times. Lately, we have been looking for a house, I have prayed and prayed and asked God to show us where He wants us to be, to give us confirmation somehow about what decision to make. Yet He remains quiet.

“…..do not hold your peace or be still, O God!” If there is something I need right now, it is peace from God. Because all I feel lately is stress and self-doubt.
Why would God remain silent when I am reaching and grasping and begging for His presence? When I desperately feel like I need Him now more than ever?

Matthew 7:7 says “Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you.”

That verse is a promise right? Then why don’t I feel like I’m finding anything? Why do I come back empty handed.
This is how I have felt for the past week and a half. Maybe, you have felt the same way. But what if every time I wanted to hear something from God, I did? What if every time I started seeking Him, I found Him. Just like that. Would I have any faith? Would I still put forth effort every day to show God that I earnestly want to know Him more? Or would I only seek Him when I felt like I needed Him, when He became my last option.

I learned today that Matthew 7:7 is a promise. If I seek Him, I will find Him. But it might not be in the time I would like for it to be. I might have to keep my hand reached out longer than I wish or than I feel comfortable doing. I might have to search and search and come up empty handed and discouraged. But in His timing, He will show Himself and the reunion will be that much more satisfying. How can I know the worth of what I find unless I search for it? The most expensive, valuable, and beautiful jewels are the ones that take effort and time to discover. They are hard to find.

When God remains silent it might be for a day, a week, two weeks, a month… maybe years. Whether it is a prayer request or just a daily study. But don’t lose faith. If you seek Him you will find Him. That is a promise from God Almighty! It can be discouraging coming back empty handed, I know. The past week I have been in the depths of despair because I keep coming back empty from my quiet time with God. But I know that I will find Him, because He loves me and you enough to make Himself accsessible to us through Jesus Christ and the Holy Spirit.

So next time God remains silent don’t lose faith. In fact, have more faith because you know that you will find. And don’t go looking elsewhere for something to fill that place where God is suppose to be. The pleasures of this world are quick, easy, and will quickly fade away. But what God gives you is everlasting, and fulfilling. It just might take some time and faith while God remains silent, but when He does speak it will be sweeter and more fulfilling than ever before.

My Way Or The Highway

Today I was listening to a devotional on YouTube by The Vigilant Christian (I’ll link it at the end of this post). He started to explain something that I knew in my head, but didn’t quite understand it in my heart. I had one of those “duh” moments. When I know I knew something, but it didn’t quite hit me until this morning.
Whenever a Christian does God’s will, God receives the glory for it. Because ultimately that is His will in all that we do, to point back at Him. However, when we as Christians (and this goes to unbelievers too), do our own thing, the glory goes to Satan. I have always thought that if I just do my own thing, I’m not really doing anything that bad. I always thought that it didn’t effect anyone, and that I was just slacking off on doing God’s will.
But the truth is, that whenever I do “my own thing”. I am giving Satan the glory.

Matthew 7:14-15 ESV “Enter by the narrow gate. For the gate is wide, and the way is easy that leads to destruction, and those who enter by it are many. For the gate is narrow and the way is hard that leads to life, and those who find it are few.”

There are 2 ways in life, not three! The wide gate and the narrow gate. Whenever you decide to do your own thing and stray from doing God’s will, you start to go towards the wide gate. You don’t have to be a Satanist or an Atheist or a Hillary Clinton supporter to give Satan the glory (couldn’t resist that last one sorry;). All you have to do is start by giving the glory to yourself rather than to God.

In fact, someone gave the glory to himself instead of God a looonnnggg time ago and look what happened… (Ezekiel 28:17) “Your heart was proud because of your beauty; you corrupted your wisdom for the sake of your splendor. I cast you to the ground; I exposed you before kings, to feast their eyes on you.” ( Full account can be found in Ezekiel 28:11-19)

That verse is talking about Satan himself! Doing his own thing is why he was cast down in the first place! Do you not think that Satan will try to use that very same tactic on us as Christians? If you don’t, just look around you. Every thing in our society today is about fulfilling the desires of the flesh. It is practically a playground for Satan.

1 Peter 5:8 ESV “Be sober-minded; be watchful. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour.”

It is easy for me to make excuses about choosing my will instead of God’s especially when I think that it doesn’t really do harm to anyone. But the truth is, whenever I chase after my will, and things that will bring me glory, I am pointing right back to Satan.

Luke 9:23 “And he said to all, “If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me.”

Proverbs 3:5-6 “Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths.”

Remember, there are two path to choose, the narrow and the wide. There isn’t three, the narrow, the wide, and then my own way. So be watchful that you choose to do the will of God and to bring Him glory. Every other way that you try to follow (including your own) will just be to the glory of Satan.

Ephesians 6:12 “For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principlities, against powers, against the rulers of darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places.”

Maybe, like me, you had a “duh” moment or maybe you read this and thought “I can’t believe she is just now realizing this, that was in Christianity 101?!”

Either way, as a Christian be watchful about what you do and for whose will it is for. Now that God has shown me this, I look back and see all the ways I had given Satan the glory when I thought I was just doing my own thing for a little bit. Stay steadfast! Yes, I will mess up again but that is where grace comes in. And God’s grace in my life when I do “my own thing” just points right back to him. So even if we mess up, remember that God has already won the battle! We just need to be watchful for ways Satan will try to use us for his own glory.

Here is the link for the video from The Vigilant Christian. His video was what made me realize what I wrote about today!  But he explains it waayyy simpler than I do;P Plus, it is only 5 minutes long so definitely check out his channel!

10 Ways To Look Less Tired

It doesn’t matter if I get 8 hours of sleep or 5 hours, I always look tired. I have had dark circles under my eyes even when I was little. So with that being said, I have learned a thing or two about how to look awake, fresh, and rejuvenated:) 

1- Avoid dark colors 

Especially if you already have dark hair and eyes (like me), wearing a black shirt or even a dark lipstick can draw more attention to dark circles under your eyes. Even black eyeliner can drag you down. Try to opt out for an eyeliner that compliments your eye color. (I use copper or purple since I have brown eyes)

2-Wear your hair in a half up-do. 

With all of my hair up, I look tired. With all of my hair down, I look tired. But wearing a half up-do opens up and frames the face. Plus its in style now!

3- Use a color correcting concealer. 

Color correcting is definitely not something I was on board with. Except for peach toned concealers. I got mine from NYX for only 5$ and it really does make such a difference! I either just use the NYX concealer or layer it under my Nars Radiant Creamy concealer.

4- Wear earrings.

What better way to distract others from your dark circles than a pair of sparkly studs?! 😉 But really though, whenever I wear earrings it draws attention away from the center of my face and balances it out. I prefer 💎 studs or something sparkly.

5-Avoid matte finish makeup.

This may be debatable, but in my personal experience whenever I use matte foundation/concealer/lipstick, I tend to look more tired and flat. I prefer more dewy, glowy skin. Or even like a satin finish foundation because I feel like it looks more natural and healthy. (I’m not saying that everyone who uses matte finish foundation looks tired btw)

6- Wash your face with cold water. 

When you feel awake, you tend to look more awake and what else wakes you up like a splash of cold water? Personally I love washing my face with cold water in the mornings, though it did take some getting used to!

7- Use light/beige colored eyeshadows.

Whenever I’m in a rush I take a light pinky beige eyeshadow and apply it all over my lid and up to the browbone. This brightens up the whole eye area,makes your eyelashes stand out a bit more, and makes your eyes look bigger.

8- Use an eyecream.

I am a skincare junkie. I love finding new products that help better my skin. This eyecream by Clinique is fairly new and I got it with some of my Sephora points. A hydrated under eye area not only looks healthy and youthful, but also helps prep the skin for makeup. 

9-Keep it simple. 

Less is more. Whenever I wear a ton of eyeshadow and liner and blush and bronzer and highlighter etc etc….. Throughout the day it can make me look tired. Some nights I wash off my makeup only to find that I looked more tired with it on than I did without. So if you didn’t sleep a lot or have been traveling, or stressed lately try to keep your makeup simplistic.

10-COFFEE☕☕☕

I don’t really think this one deserves an explanation because isn’t coffee the answer to everything?😜

I hope some of these helped you and if you know of anymore let me know! Don’t stress away your joy over vanity (like i tend to do sometimes). Remember that God made you beautiful and for a purpose (dark circles and all)!!

Letting God Dig Out My Splinters

Last week my church had revival and it was really great! We had people saved, and some rededicate their life to the Lord. As with most revivals, each night there was an altar call to give everyone who was there an oppurtunity to humbly pray to God, repent, ask for forgivness, etc… One of the things about true revival is that it doesn’t feel good. In fact, it can be really uncomfortable. For saved people, it can mean repenting of sins and asking for forgiveness of sins. It is a season of restoration.

I’m still studying Hosea using Jennifer Rothschild’s study guide (I had gotten way behind but I’m catching up!). One passage from Hosea really stuck out to me while studying.

Hosea Chapter 6:1-3 (ESV)

“Come, let us return to the Lord; for he has torn us, that he may heal us; he has struck us down, and he will bind us up. After two days he will revive us; on the third day he will raise us up, that we may live before him. Let us know; let us press on to know the Lord; his going out is sure as the dawn; he will come to us like showers, as the spring rains that water the earth.”

This passage in Hosea is talking about Israel and Judah being unrepentant. Hosea is prophesing to the people, telling them that there can be restoration. Revival! A part of the revival process is God correcting us. This past week God laid things on my heart that I knew I needed to change and it didn’t feel good. But just because I went to the altar, asked for forgiveness, and prayed about it doesn’t make it revival. Revival is a process. Like Pastor Henry said “Revival isn’t a series of messages.” Which is so true! In the verses above revival was God tearing down Israel and Judah so He can build them up. God has to knock down my pride to help me grow. He has to show me I can’t depend on myself so I can start depending on Him.

For me, last week wasn’t just a revival but it has been the start of revival. It was a time when God showed me that I was in need of Him, the ways I had gone astray, and He said Let’s begin! But it doesn’t feel good. This week I have caught myself being mean and irritable. Why? Because God has been showing me things about myself that I don’t want to deal with. He has torn me. But He is also healing me.

Whenever you get a splinter what do you do? Unless you want it to get infected and swell up, you have to dig it out. And it hurts! Especially if someone else is doing it for you. I always wanted to be in control of getting the splinters out of my fingers so whenever it started hurting, I could stop. Revival is the same way. It hurts to dig out my sin and bring it to the light, especially when God is the one doing it! It is easier to just ignore our sin, but if we do it will swell up and affect us more than we thought it would.

“Let us know; let us press on to know the Lord…” To have revival you have to keep on keeping on. Be steadfast! When revival week for my church ended, it shouldn’t be the end of my personal revival. That week was a jumpstart. A call from God saying “I’m ready, whenever you are willing!”. Like I have said about 4 times already, Revival is a process. And it has it’s rewards too “…he will come to us as the showers, as the spring rains that water the earth.” That’s a promise!

I don’t know what revival may mean to you. It could be repenting, forgiving, letting go, making commitments, being honest, etc… only you and God know that. But remember, don’t stop your revival at the altar. Like verse 6 says in this same passage, He desires steadfast love, and that is exactly what it takes to be revived! Steadfast in our love for Him that we press on through the judgement and allow God to dig out our splinters so He can start to heal us.